Gorgeous Glam Old Hollywood Inspired Black and White Wedding

2 Dresses or even two Tuxes!! : From the beginning of my dress search, I knew it would be two dresses! It's your fabulous day..why not? I could not decide between fairy tale or sexy siren, so i opted to be both. My first dress was magical..HUGE but light, delicate but beautifully structured.  It made me feel youthful, but at the same time all grown up. It made me want to run through meadows and skip stones holding my future husband's hand... I had to wear it. My second dress was completely opposite. Fitted, cinched, sexy, ready for dancing. Still completely bridal, but in a different way.  When i changed after dinner, it was like a shift had occurred. It set another tone for the party, like a new beat in the story.  My new husband and i  made another entrance together. We weren't announced, we just stepped down the stairs into the tent and people went nuts! They started clapping and cheering. They loved it. They want to see things like that. All eyes are on you in a good way.  If i had it my way, I would have had him change into a different tux. He started out with a navy and black satin lapel tux, but it would have been amazing to see him in white!  So Gilded Age, so Clark Gable!
For sure that is my advice to grooms...change it up..it's your big day too! You will feel like a superstar.
P.s.- Try to purchase both dresses, any belts, or headpieces from the same store. They usually cut you a deal for buying everything there. Also, I purchased my second dress during a "trunk show" that the bridal salon was having, so I received an even bigger discount on my second gown!

Bridal Party Bonanza!:
Our wedding party wasn't that big, but the personalities sure were. If i had to look back i wouldn't change a thing. They were all up there for a reason, crazy and all. If i had to do it again, i would change the way i reacted to their pre -wedding drama. I can't tell you how many calls i received from the girls about their dresses and alterations, changing the look of the dress, not looking good in it or alterations not going right, etc.. Each conversation i took personally, and stressed about.  DON'T.  They are all grown women. They will figure it out. At one point in time I said " I leave it in your hands"..and that was the best decision I ever made. Micro managing was not a good thing.  My advice:  From the beginning  talk with them about what you are looking for in a bridesmaid, the look you are going for with their gowns, hair and makeup..the feel of it all,  and express to them how much trust you have in them in helping create that look for  your special day.  They will appreciate it and hopefully remember that when it comes to crunch time. It also doesn't hurt to assign 1 girl, it doesn't have to be the maid of honor, to handle the "crazy" when it comes to dresses.  Someone who is calm, who can calm, and knows a little bit about dresses an alterations.

DO Involve Dogs:
If you have them, use them. This was a fun, totally unique  part of our day. Our ceremony was moved inside because of the heatwave and dogs were not allowed. We had a pre ceremony popcorn and champagne pass, so we decided to make them a part of that. It was awesome! Guest were greeted by our two little chiuahuahs in a custom wedding wagon that we made.  It was so "us".  Just another little detail to throw in. It was a picture bonanza! Whether in ceremony or post ceremony, or picturess before the ceremony, make your furry friends a part of it, you won't regret it.
Pre Ceremomy Cocktails/ Refreshments/ passed bites:
If you can do it, by all means DO! It is a great time for your guests to gather before the ceremony.  A lot of people might be just coming off a long day of traveling and then rushing to your wedding, some might have already been there the night before and are anxious for the festivities to start. Either way it's a great time to set the stage  for your wedding. It starts things off right. People become more relaxed and start mingling before the reception. They are fully present by the time the ceremony arrives
Strolling Weddings:
Of course I love all types of weddings, but my favorite part is usually an extravagant cocktail hour and Vianeese stroll. I love all the variety, but I also love not having a structured timeline around food. When it came time to plan my own wedding, I did just that. I called it a "strolling wedding" There was food and drinks all throughout the entire event. We structured it into 3 headings (cocktail stroll/dinner stroll Vianesse stroll) but the window times were open. Each one lasted about 2 and a half hours. Guest were welcome to peruse through the mansion into the different rooms that had all the variety of food you could ever want. We took a demanding structure out of the equation so our friends and family could enjoy themselves at their leisure,  and really just enjoy being with us. We also did not have assigned tables or seating, but we had plenty of it in different forms. ( different size tables, and lots of furniture) We feel that with assigned seating,  it locks guests down and keeps people from mingling as much as they would with an open seating plan. The guest loved it.

Live Music:
Best choice we made. It brings the ceremony and the reception up a million notches. We had a string quartet for the ceremony and an 11 piece band for the reception. They definitely are way more expensive than a classic DJ, but it changes the event. There's nothing like live music. All the great singers and beautiful instruments all together,  it's a WOW factor.  There are a lot of bands out there. My advice is to definitely go hear them play live. Many of these companies have showcases so you can see a few in one night. It's fun, you're planning for your big day, but your also having a great night out with your fiance.

Preview the space:
As I said earlier, the night just takes off. Although there were so many details that i planned for my wedding, I didn't really get to see them. Now i am reliving a lot of it through pictures and cinema, but if you can, before it all begins..walk through the space, take in the details, because at the end of the night, it will all seem like a dream.

Importance of Photography and Cinema:
We can get so caught up in the "day of" details of a wedding, however, when the next day comes what do you really remember? It's all such a whirlwind. I am almost 2 months post wedding and I cannot tell you how many times i stare at my photos and watch our movie. Every time it gets me. I laugh, I cry happy tears,  it brings me right back to that day.  It's priceless. My advice: spend good money on these two things. They won't seem like the biggest thing at the time,  but they by far will be.

DO a FIRST LOOK:
I was that bride that i think a lot of us are when we start dreaming about our weddings.  "I want him to see me for the first time EVER walking down the aisle,"  "i want to see his reaction, " "we  won't feel the same if we see each other before!"That is 100 percent NOT TRUE. The first look with your future husband is a moment that you will never have again that day.  It's a moment that it's just you and him, no one watching, no one talking, no one directing, no one planning. Time stops for those few yet precious moments, it's like you are the only two people in the world. You owe that moment to each other, take it. ( And trust me, he will still be overwhelmed with love an emotion when you walk down that aisle, how could he not?

Take time to have a moment with your parents:
This one is huge. The day and the night will be such a whirlwind. Your parents, you, your new husband will all be working the room. You will of course see each other,  but you won't actually have time to be with each other.  Take that time. Take the time to just sit with them and relax, even if it's just 5 minutes  to take it all in. Take the time to see what you all created and planned collectively. Take the time to see all of your guests enjoying the night, the celebration, each other. You will cherish that way beyond that one night. That memory will be everlasting.

DO hire a DAY OF PLANNER/Coordinator:
No matter how organized you are, no matter what caterer or florist or hotel/site manager says they will do for you, or services they offer, they won't be able to oversee everything. That's where a "day of" coordinator comes in. They will take the worry out of your hands. They will be on top of it all, as you planned it to be. Any of these "mini disasters" i mentioned below would have totally been taken care of if I had a "day of" person.  Again, they were small things that barely anyone noticed, but i like to think of it as extra insurance. This is a must for a perfectionist bride.

DISASTER STRIKING:I will have to say, there weren't any major disasters on my wedding day. I was waiting for the shoe to drop because of all the nightmares i had heard of with other bride's weddings.  A few things were "not as exactly planned"- but such small details only I would have known about. (not all ceremony champagne glasses having gold rimming sugar/ the custom ice cubes flipping on their sides once the drink was made so you couldn't see the logo/ the wind taking 2 of the large reception  floral arrangements down, one  right onto two of the guests/ the candles not staying lit/ the heat wave/ the pre ceremony fresh popcorn getting soggy because of the humidity/ forgetting the groomsman boutonniere's up at the mansion when we were down at the cathedral already (we did get them in time!) / my bridesmaids not knowing how to bustle my dress/ missing Chambord favors for the guest on the champagne tower/  did I mention the 100 degree heat wave?!)  All of these things were blips, little bumps in the grand scheme of this fabulous wedding. Some of them I knew of some of them not a clue. The key was the vendors. They figured it out, they fixed it, they made it work. They knew just what to tell me and what not to tell me. They knew that i liked to be an informed bride, but they also knew that too much information would make me bananas. You ask if I could redo it, how would i do it? I have to be honest, I wouldn't redo much. It all starts with a great team, you need to establish that from the beginning. You have to do your research. There are so many companies out there, some good, some great, and definitely some bad. In the end, it will make a huge difference in your day based who you hire.

Budget Breakdown:
Wedding Budget:$110, 000 (we went over)

Photographer;Between $3,200 & 4,000
Cinematographer:Between $3,200-4,800

Venue:
All a la carte/ just to rent the space was $9,000
Cathedral rental;$1,500
Officiant:$500

Floral:$8,000
Chandeliers/Draping:$6,000
Chivari Chair Rental and extra tables:
$1500

Gourmet Catering:$35,000 ( does not include gratuity)

Liquor & wine:(my venue was a la carte everything,  you had to order your own stuff and have it delivered)$6,000

Wedding cake:$480 (that is with the caterers discount)

Band:$11,500 receptionadditional $400 to make it a jazz quartet to add to the 2 hour cocktail stroll

String Quartet:$1,500 ( played for hour and a half)

Specialty Table Linens:$1,500
Furniture Rental'$3,000

Dress budget:
(with 2 dresses)
$7,000 with alterations

Dress Accessories and shoes (all together)$ 1,000
Men's tux rentals with shoes:$180 a piece
Tuxedo Shirts:$100-( i had them buy specialty shirts)
Bridesmaid dresses:1 type was $2901 type was $320

Custom detail items and extras:napkins/signage/stickers/'to go" boxes/matches/frames/memory candles/welcome bags/custom dog wagon materials/pillows/cigars/bathroom baskets
$2,100

Custom Mirrored Calligraphy:$375 ( without cost of mirrors) additional $150

Invitation suite:(with custom postage)$1500
Save the dates:$140
Hair and makeup artists:For bride:$120 for makeup$100 for hair ( does not include trials)
For the wedding party:$80 for hair$80 for makeup

Day of getting ready food for maids and men:$350
Hotel Room Blocks:$109 plus tax a night
Rehearsal dinner:$4,000 (35 people)

Day after brunch$2,800 (75 people)

Bridesmaids/Groomsman Gifts:$1,600

Transportation for wedding guest$1,500 (does not include gratuity)

Custom Ice cubes:$450

Event Planner/Stylist:
$0-FREE!
I was always into planning events. Any type of party I could throw, I did. I love the planning, styling and executing of it all, it excites me. It was no different when it came to my own wedding. I did not hire a wedding planner. I planned and coordinated  every last detail  myself, and i had a blast doing it. The endless emails , vendor visits, meetings, timelines, tastings,  styling and budgeting were right up my alley. After the wedding weekend was over, I couldn't wait to plan the next thing. I didn't have the wedding blues.. I felt invigorated.  That was when i knew wedding planning was the path for me.
I cannot wait to take all that i have experienced and learned a long the  planning journey of my own wedding,  and share it with future brides alike.  I now know what my true calling is.