10 Tips For Writing Your Vows 1. Make a choice: Choose whether or not the vows will be traditionally scripted or if you want to make your own. Rejoice, because this will probably the easiest choice in the wedding planning process. Booklets: Brown Fox Calligraphy. 1. Make a choice: Choose whether or not the vows will be traditionally scripted or if you want to make your own. Rejoice, because this will probably the easiest choice in the wedding planning process. Booklets: Brown Fox Calligraphy.2. Plan ahead: There is no rule that says you cant talk about your vows with your partner before youre at the altar. Make a plan together about the vow length, tone, theme, and even specific content. No one wants the grooms vow to be hilarious and the brides a tear-jerker. Thats awkward. Photography: Rustic White Photography. Calligraphy: Happy Lettering.3. Plan long ahead: Discuss the heavier stuff with your partner long before the stress of the place settings, the florists invoice, and the final guest list sets in. Take some time to come up with a plan together so that you have plenty of time to think of the specific words on your own.4. Think: Make a list of words related to feelings, experiences, and memories you have shared with your partner. What made them powerful? What about those feelings and experiences can you promise for the future? What feelings or experiences do you hope to replicate? Why? Photography: O'Malley Photographers.5. Its a PROMISE: We hope this is obvious, but a vow is a promise. That means that whatever you choose to say, you better mean. Come up with words that dont just sound good for your in-laws but actually illustrate your feelings for the other person. Photography: OneLove Photography.6. Practice: No matter what. Even if you know exactly what youll say and your vows are a whole twenty seconds long, you have no idea what emotions youll feel in the moment, so practice...practice...PRACTICE. Photography: Christopher Nolan Photography.7. Cue cards? Since you are going to listen to #6 and start practicing your vows long ahead of time, you may not need cue cards. If you do make them in case of emergency, card stock is recommended so youre not sweating on an index card, and write legible, separated bullet point sentences so you know where to look. Booklets: Made Divine.8. Chill out...but prepare to cry: tears will well up. Hormones tell tears its time to be free when joy and nerves combine, so let it happen. At the very least, it shows how much you care about the words you chose. Photography: AJ Dunlap.9. Because you will cry, SLOW DOWN: everyone expects you to cry, so dont try to swallow it back. If you get choked up or nervous, stop and take a breath. Your partner and the audience will find it endearing, and youll feel much better. Take as long as you need to say what you need to say. Photography: Melissa Gidney Photography. Calligraphy: Laura Lavender Calligraphy.10. Remember history: Ancient Romans did it. Medieval townsfolk made it cool. Now its your turn to honor history and commit yourself to another person in front of x number of witnesses. The tradition of vows has survived for thousands of years for a reason, so take it seriously and express the love that the gesture implies. Photography: Emily Heizer.