Engaged? Start Here
Find a Couple Get Started

The New Wedding Must Have: A Private First Dance

The New Wedding Must Have: A Private First Dance

Hey there beauties, my name is Renee, I play in a wedding band/duo called Tobi Tobi and I am about to BLOW your mind with the MOST romantic, rarely done, wedding moment ever. I am talking full Romeo and Juliet at the water tank romance, Noah and Allie kissing in the rain in the Notebook romance. 

ENTER- The Private first dance! 

The New Wedding Must Have: A Private First Dance

Let me quickly say before you dismiss this idea because you have always wanted your first dance to be surrounded by loved ones, that this could be extra to your more traditional first dance moment later on!

So, why even have a private first dance?

Ask any bride, ever, what they thought of their wedding and they will undoubtedly say - “It all went too fast”! Yep it flies and before you know it you are tucked up in bed with your love - hopefully, after some masterful, Kama sutra-style sex, trying to run your mind over all those special moments. As you're clocking them off you realise sadly, 'gosh I never really just held by new husband and soaked in the moment’. We all envisage that our vows will feel supper connected and we will say everything that we want to say without worrying AT ALL about how we look, how we sound and that we will be completely entranced by our lover's warm gaze. Has anyone seen Twilight - hoping I am not the only nerd here? You know when Bella is walking down the aisle to meet Edward and everything stops, she is completely entranced by his gorgeous, golden vampire eyes. I’d loveeeeee to tell you that will happen for you but it may not. I was so nervous that I didn’t relax until 10 pm after speeches when Ginuwine - My Pony came on! 

I wish I had taken some time out. Just my partner and I. To really let the love soak right into our wine-lined bellies! Your private first dance could be that moment. 

What do you need?

The New Wedding Must Have: A Private First Dance

A lovely spot, somewhere picturesque and secluded. Your partner and yourself obviously and your live band or duo. You might also want to bring your memory capturers along so you get some sweet photos and videos. This is also how you can justify the 5 - 10 minutes away from your guests. Not that taking time out for just you two needs justification, but if your brain works like mine then the more positive reasons to do something the better! 

Where should you place it in the day?

The New Wedding Must Have: A Private First Dance

This depends on a few things like, will this be your only special dance moment or will you be having the other more traditional style one as well? If you will be having two, then pop the private first dance during your canapés section and whilst your off getting photos taken. OR just before you enter your reception. It also depends on your setting. For example, we recently played an acoustic version of ‘Simply the Best’ for a private first dance at 8:30 pm (as most people were still enjoying Mains) outside, under the stars, couple swaying beautifully in front of a huge neon sign that simply said, LOVE. It made perfect sense at night because of the neon light, and because the couple was too shy to dance in front of their guests! 

Then simply hold each other, whisper sweet things into each other's ears. The beauty of this is, no one is around, it's JUST for you lovers! Look back with fondness upon this forever! 


Some of our favourite moments at weddings have been these Private dances. Picture a Rooftop garden in Denmark, us playing in the background singing “Kissing you” by Des'ree or a clifftop in Ibiza! Couple swaying to us playing a romantic version of “You got the love” with the MOST epic of views in the background! 

Every time we play a private first dance, I inevitably receive an email in the days that follow saying that it was the most special moment of the entire day! It might seem crazy but I can see it too! I can feel the couple relaxing into each other as I play out their chosen song! It is beautiful! Bahhhhh I feel so lucky to do this for a living!


I have been asking myself for a while now why the “Private first dance” is not a staple at weddings so here I am trying to convince ya’ll to go for it! 

GO FOR IT! 


The New Wedding Must Have: A Private First Dance

And please, you simply MUST choose live music. Don’t play your favourite song through a little dodgy speaker ploiseeeeeee - I mean do it if you have to, but live music is so much better/vibier obviously that applies to your wedding ceremony too. A quick music finding tip: find a band that makes you feel, that gives you goosebumps. They are the right people to play at your wedding day and you MUST book them right now! 

MUCH LOVE

Tobi Tobi

Continue to next story