• Tips & Advice

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Are you having amazing sex with your wife? Odds are, the answer is yes. The real question is whether she’s having great sex with you.

Every woman is unique and has her own desires and fantasies in the bedroom. She has a specific way she likes to be touched, words she likes, words she hates, and a seduction technique that's going to work for her.

Great lovers are not born, they are created! As her husband, it's your desire to rock your wife's world and give her the ultimate pleasure. Here are 9 tips sure to set your sex life on fire.

1. SET THE MOOD

It's no secret that a woman's sex life can differ greatly from a man’s.

That's not to say your wife doesn't have a bursting libido. Quite the contrary. But it takes her body longer to react to intimacy than yours might.

Husbands looking to amp up their sex lives should help their wives get into it by setting the mood.

Start early in the day by paying your wife compliments. Send her romantic and sexy texts throughout the day. When you get home, set the mood further by putting on some inspiring music and lighting some candles. Make your session romantic or full of passion and desire. All this buildup will be worth it.

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2. Foreplay is Everything

Many intimacy issues come from an unsatisfying sex life. In order to give your wife the time of her life in the bedroom, always remember that foreplay comes first.

Because women take longer to climax than men, foreplay is going to be the key to giving her an orgasm. Kiss her, caress each other, massage her, focus on touching her clit, and take your time.

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3. Care About Her Pleasure

Research indicates that women have longer orgasms than men. The average female orgasm lasts from 3 to 15 seconds, with the longest orgasmic duration lasting between 20 seconds to 2 minutes.

As her loving husband, you want to give her this mind-blowing orgasm. Show her you care by taking your time and reminding her that there is no rush. Tell her that turning her on turns you on.

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4. Be Romantic

Women appreciate romance in a marriage.

Buy her flowers, dance with her, take her out to dinner and flirt with her all night long. Anything you can do to show her that she is loved, appreciated, and desired is going to go a long way in boosting her libido.

Romance also evokes a sense of passion in the relationship, which heightens feelings of love and desire.

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5. Communicate about Sex

One of the biggest pieces of relationship advice for men is to talk to your wife.

Communication is the backbone of a healthy relationship, and your sex life is no exception. Research shows that sexual communication is positively connected with sexual satisfaction and heightened relationship quality.

The bottom line: Couples who talk about their sexual desires, fantasies, and issues have more satisfying sex lives than those who don't.

Get to know your wife's fantasies and indulge her. Learn how she likes to be touched and what her body needs in order to climax.

Also keep in mind that most women do not orgasm from penetrative sex alone, so make sure you are touching her clit while you pleasure her, whether it’s during foreplay or intercourse. She will thank you for it!

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6. Practice Good Self-Care

Practicing excellent self-care is one way to avoid intimacy issues.

When you become intimate with your wife, you likely appreciate her doing her hair and makeup and being clean and shaven. Similarly, you enhance your wife's experience by making sure you are clean and well-groomed.

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7. Mix it Up

One way to avoid intimacy issues and add some excitement to your sex life is to spice it up. Get your wife excited about new ideas. Such ideas may include:

• Surprise her with naughty toys
• Flirt with her in a public setting
• Have some fun in the back of your car (in a private place, of course!)
• Buy sexy games
• Play with restraints
• Leave a bottle of whipped cream by the side of the bed
• Pretend to be strangers meeting at a bar
• Subscribe to a monthly sex box

Whatever ideas you use to mix it up, changing up your lovemaking can boost desires and strengthen your intimate connection.

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8. Use Lube

Don't let the thought of using lube become an intimacy issue. Using lube doesn't mean your girl isn't turned on by you or that you've failed somehow. It's just a sure-fire way to enhance your wife's sexual pleasure.

Whether she's taking medication that slows her ability to naturally lubricate or she's post-menopause, lubrication is an absolute gift.

Using lube inside the vagina can help eliminate any delay before having intercourse. It also makes sex more comfortable, especially if the man is well endowed. Lube reduces friction, which could otherwise lead to pain, irritation, and potential infection.

Applying lubrication to the clit can also help a woman orgasm faster than touching her dry. There are also fun lubricants designed to tingle or heat the area where applied, which can add some sizzle to your sex life.

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9. Be Patient

Women may take longer to climax than men. It is estimated that it takes men anywhere from 2 to 14 minutes to orgasm, while it takes women a solid 20 minutes on average. This is an unfortunate mismatch.

Women need to be relaxed and focused in order to climax. The more impatient you seem, the more difficulty she will have crossing the finish line.

Instead, be supportive and patient while you make love.

This might mean you stopping during intercourse and going back to foreplay in order to prevent yourself from finishing before she does.

Your wife will truly appreciate your love, kindness, and patience in the bedroom.

There is nothing sexier than a man who gets turned on by pleasing his wife in the bedroom. Patience is a virtue when it comes to making her climax. So, banish intimacy issues forever by focusing on foreplay, building up sexual anticipation, and communicating about your sex life together. 

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Author Bio : Rachael Pace is a relationship expert with years of experience in training and helping couples. She has helped countless individuals and organizations around the world, offering effective and efficient solutions for healthy and successful relationships. She is a featured writer for Marriage.com, a reliable resource to support healthy happy marriages.